How Is That Like My Life?

So, I'm looking out into my backyard and I see the Red Squirrel sitting on a very skinny branch of a
bush.  Yes, the Red Squirrel is still around and still keeping most the other critters away.  Often I see two of them, now.  They do act quite differently from the bigger grey and black squirrels who used to frolic in my backyard.

As I watch, Red does not move - not one little bit.  Red appears to have its tail up along its back and I can just make out its white belly.  Ten minutes go by (maybe just six or seven, but a long time, anyway), and I start to wonder if I am really seeing Red, or am I seeing a leaf.  My eyes aren't perfect and Red is about fifty feet away.

This is most peculiar behavior, I'm thinking.  Red doesn't usually pay me much never mind and I couldn't see anything else threatening in the yard.  I was reminded of a time when I watched a rabbit stand frozen for fifteen minutes.  But that was a rabbit; not peculiar behavior for a rabbit.

It's a leaf, I decide, and move on.  A few minutes later I look again.  No leaf on the branch and no leaf on the ground.  It had to have been Red.

How is that like my life? (This is a question I use often to make sense of things, of myself, and possibly get to an aha moment or breakthrough.)  When else have I known what was so and then second guessed myself?  I knew what was true then allowed doubt to enter.

Has that ever happened to you?  You know that you know for sure, then allow someone else, or you're own stinkin' thinkin', to mess with your mind. I do it way too often, but now - I am more aware that I am doing it and can let myself know that I know.

Why do we do this?  Low self-esteem?  Lack of self-confidence?  Someone tell you you were not smart as a kid and you decided to believe it?  Maybe just fear of being wrong so we change our answer on the test at the last minute.  "I thought I made a mistake, but I was mistaken."

I was right then I was wrong, but first I was right.  Why couldn't I just let myself be right?  Ah, I am still learning.  I am still learning to check in with my "heart mind", my inner brain, for what is true.  With Red, I let my mind mess with me, using my own yet-to-be-revealed beliefs about myself against me.

Now I have more power!  The power of awareness.  The power of insight.  The power of enlightenment.  Thank you, Red the Squirrel, for these valuable teachings.   

The Drama Demon

Drama. We all get sucked into it at times if we aren’t awake and aware. I refer to awake and aware as being in my right mind. I am totally guilty of being asleep at the wheel, jerking awake to look around and say “What the hell just happened? How long have I been here?”

What gets me is that I know better. I have practiced standing in that neutral space, separating the facts from the stories and blocking the energies shot in my direction. Still, sometimes I’m caught unaware. I am grateful for the years of practice that help me “wake up!” much sooner than later.

This ever happen to you? You get wrapped up in your perceptions, or someone else’s perceptions, making up stories and proclaiming what is right and what is wrong - rather loudly! Then you proceed to bring others into your drama, convincing them that you are right and justice must be served! Well, maybe not to that extreme. Maybe you just start feeling bad, your vibration takes a dive, and you just want to feel better.

Is it possible to avoid the Drama Demon? Yes. Let me give you a couple examples.

First, take a step back. Now, identify what is fact from the parts that are made up. By fact, I mean, those things that are tangible, touchable, etc. As in “these words were said.” Leave out all the emotion. Now, the rest is all perception. We give meaning to the “words said” (we fill in the blanks) and draw from our past to make sense of what we just heard. Don’t get me wrong, our past serves us well, unless it doesn’t. Our past experiences can keep us safe and help us from making “the same mistake.” But sometimes our past remembrances can cause us to assign an experience that just does not apply in every situation.

Second, ask yourself “what else can it be?” Again, we make up the stories and there are always lots of stories that be imagined in any situation. Try to get more facts. If this isn’t possible, stick to the story that works best for you. One that comes from love and helps you to feel good. Do not judge – discern.

A little practice and you may find you can avoid a lot of drama. Besides, no one likes having to say they made a mistake and have to make amends after playing with the Drama Demon. Been there, done that, too.