Wednesday, March 31, 2010

What's So Bad About Feeling Bad?

What is so bad about feeling bad? This question popped into my head while deep in discussion about why we do the things we do to avoid feeling bad. Think about it! Think about all the instant gratification stuff we do to avoid feeling bad: eating, drinking, sexing, drugging, watching TV or other zone-out screen watching (games, computer), spend too much money. Feel bad, do this feel better - for just a little while, then do it again.

And that is just what we do for ourselves. Think about all we do so that the others around us will not feel bad: lie, cook, pour, lend, look the other way, gift. All just so that we feel better, that we have some peace.

But look at all the opportunities we missed just because we didn't take the time to listen and understand the "bad" feeling to begin with. Fix it fast - with a bandaid. Poke your finger into the bleeding hole, and don't move! How often have we interrupted someone else's "aha" moment by handing them a tissue, a chocolate, keys to the car?

I'm sure I have missed out on some awesome breakthroughs, for myself and others, by making the bad feeling bad and trying to put the fix to it immediately. What is so bad about feeling bad? Not a thing. Not one little thing.

So use it. Take the opportunity to have a little chat with yourself next time you have a feeling you call bad. It just may be the "big" one you've been waiting for, the aha of all ahas! I'm certainly going to be with the next bad feeling long enough to get clear on it before taking any action, if any action is required. More importantly, I am no longer going to help someone avoid the bad just so I can feel good.

This will not be easy, but I do not feel "bad" about that in the least!