The Latest "Cuss" Word

This is my holiday gift for you, wishing you a wonderful, prosperous 2010! Someone asked me to think of the perfect gift I'd like to receive and my response was "that one thing that keeps me from manifesting, experiencing, allowing and receiving prosperity into my life."

So, how can I give this to you? I'm not sure but I do have an observation that just may be the trick for some of you. I know the application of this gift is already making a difference in my state of affluence.

For the last couple months I have been noticing the phrase "I can't afford it", being used by myself, my employees, customers, friends and family. It became like a red flag, demanding I pay attention.

Some people said "I can't afford (something)" in order to shut someone up. You know, the "Hi, how are you?" "Fine." - end of conversation conversation. Many times when I heard the "I can't afford....." I just knew it wasn't the truth, whether the speaker recognized they were lying or not.

And way too often it was just what it was...a belief that it just wasn't possible, a conversation about lack. Especially now with all this talk about the economy and bad times. Listen closely and you can hear a choir of "can't afford" at any time across the country.

I have decided that this should be considered the newest, latest "cuss" word/phrase, that a penalty should be paid for each utterance. I have given some of my friends the equivalent of "cuss boxes" for their quarters, dollars, whatever they choose, and asked them to spread the word.

Because...this particular phrase of lack is totally dis empowering. At the very best, it is a bad habit, complete with negative energy and low vibration. We need to eliminate it and replace it with empowering, vibration raising affirmations.

Now, exactly what kind of affirmations to use have eluded me until recently. The problem with affirmations are unless they have even a slight chance of being true for you, they are empty words and will not fill the void created by NOT saying that phrase of lack.

So I have this suggestion instead: talk about what you are choosing to do with excitement and passion. For instance, instead of saying I can't afford (that something), say with enthusiasm something like "oh, I just love it, but I am so close to saving for (name it), or so close to paying off that credit card and being debt free!!! Yeah!!!

Get the idea? Be excited about your goals and your progress, not down about stuff you choose not to have just at this time. Do not buy into the victim hood community, avoid the woe is me sayers, the we are family in doom and gloom.

Just imagine for a moment everyone being excited about tomorrow and its possibilities, as a choir, at any time. What a difference - and how could the Universe possibility say no?

Have a Happy, Prosperous New Year!

Deserving vs Earning

This may be a little deep for the Holidays, but I think it's an excellent time to do some soul-searching. If we can find some gunk that tends to block our holiday good cheer, and get rid of it - all the merrier!

Okay, so I'm still looking into this internal/external thing which, for me, tends to take me in circles until I get to the core. So hang in there with me, please.

We often read/hear that in order to manifest we must believe we are deserving. Now, I can justify why I deserve something. Say I want to manifest a raise in pay. Do I believe I deserve a raise in pay? Well, of course! I earned it! Just look at all the great things I've done for this company! Oh my gosh, they probably don't deserve me! So why isn't a raise in my reality?

Using justification for deserving is an ego trap! It does not raise my vibration to the level of the "raise" I want! It can get me started toward a feeling good vibration, but I must be careful not to take it into an anger or victim-hood low vibration. It is best to feel deserving without the need for justification. Deserving - internal, justification - external.

When and how does one separate deserving and earning? Do you deserve or earn respect? Do you earn or deserve a camera? You may deserve to be trusted, but if you have abused that trust with someone, you may need to earn that trust back. Earning is a doing thing, an external thing. Deserving is internal - a feeling thing, a way of being.

So, in order to manifest, there must be the internal and external. Deserving (internal feeling) and earning (the external action) through speaking, doing, writing, taking the steps toward the goal. They can actually feed each other toward creation! I raise my vibration as I take action, and my increased vibration makes action more focused and, dare I say, pleasurable! Which helps me feel better still!

So, now, is naughty or nice an internal or an external? And do we give gifts based on deserving or earning/justification? Oh, this puzzle is too big for one sitting. Puzzles have always been one of my favorite things to do this time of year....but I usually have help!

Your comments are most welcome and appreciated! Oh, and thank you for passing this forward!

Love and Light and Happy Holidays!

Stream of Thought

I began preparing (in my mind) to write about expectations. Recently reading a great blog by my friend Jennifer Tavana, I had some ideas I wanted to record for you. Mostly about being attached to outcomes in the business of manifestation. Then I started thinking about all the different ways of manifesting there are out there, published and promoted by various well-known and not so well-known authors and teachers.

My mind proceeded to how people are still bad-mouthing the DVD "The Secret" and how I thought this was quite unfair since The Secret actually has all the elements of manifestation in it if one is paying very close attention. Often people are leaving one or more key parts out of the practice.

Then I started thinking about what those parts were, like raising your vibration. What does that mean and how do you do that? Abraham-Hicks says "feel good." Simple, yes, but how?

This was followed by my review of how I manifested being in Traverse City, owner of the Higher Self Bookstore. How did I raise my vibration to make everything fall into place to perfectly? Well, I was excited, and scared - same energy in the body so I called it excited, maintained that excitement, and took steps to get answers to the questions that came up along the way.

Of course, I shifted to contemplating why it didn't seem so easy now, to manifest. I know more now, I have more knowledge about the business of retail and service, so I think I expect that I should have the answers already and try to force the outcome. Checking off all the things I've read and learned about manifestation, I find I keep forgetting a key part - high vibration, feeling good.

So what the heck am I going to write about today? Notice how your thought stream flows. We all do it. I started out in one direction (writing about expectations) and rounded back to how I should know this stuff already. What did I accomplish, what did I manifest here?

What comes to me is that focus was missing for me this morning. How about you? Did you notice lots of different thoughts flowing through your head as you read this? Did you get distracted at times, or confused, lose your place?

So here's your tip for the day, and days that follow. Practice focus. Like an experiment! See if your vibration raises a little (or a lot!), if drawing to you what you say you want happens just a little more easily (or a lot!). Let me know how it goes.

Oh, I'll write on these other topics in more detail later - when I'm more focused!

Resentment

I finished reading The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand a couple weeks ago and have moved on, but the ideas from Ms. Rand's books still surface and lure me into contemplation. My latest musings have been about Mr. Rourke's (Fountainhead character)lack of resentment.

In being true to himself, his values and standards, his life was often unprofitable. He did not resent taking a job in a quarry in order to eat. He did not resent the lack of opportunities, nor did he resent those who bad-mouthed him. He lived for his passion and was patient. He never blamed anyone. He knew he had a gift, a genius, and waited humbly for the right person and the right opportunity to share that gift.

He loved his work, his creations, and was not resentful of those who did not see his creations the same as he did. He did not resent the critics - he didn't care. He just did not care what others thought of him or his different vision of building (he's an architect).

He refused to let his ideas be used and manipulated into something he didn't believe in. He was not resentful that this cost him jobs and gained himself a reputation of being selfish.

When I find myself being resentful, I immediately stop in my tracks to figure out why. I don't like the feeling at all, so I want to resolve the issue as soon as possible. Many times it is a judgment I'm holding I need to let go of. But more often, of late, it is a situation were I have let myself be used or manipulated. Where I had not been true to myself.

I am grateful for my resentment because I know it is a sign that one way or another I've given my power away. And, I look forward to the day I no longer feel resentment because I am always true to myself.

I finished reading Atlas Shrugged (I had to resist starting again from the beginning) and I'm now in the middle of The Fountainhead, both by Ayn Rand. My mind is truly playing in Ms. Rand's philosophies, so I'm going to continue to explore - like the last blog.

For the most part, the heroes and heroines are so passionate in their beliefs, values, and standards in the pursuit of the work they love, that they don't care what other people think. Can you just imagine that for a minute?

I know that as I've gotten older, and this is true for many, I care less about what other people think of me. It is very freeing! I used to go to great lengths to make sure my hemlines were exact, that my bra wouldn't show no matter how I turned, and every hair was in place. Today I'm only upset if one pant leg is shorter than the other, I make sure my bra is close to the same color as my top, and I have wash-and-go hair that often looks a little on the wild side. I like that.

But let's take it up a notch. Would I risk social scorn in taking a stand for what I believe? Would I step up, instead of stand down, when public opinion is against me? Would I take a job I am against morally to keep the house, the car, the medical insurance?

How true would I be to myself if faced with real, physical hardships? What would you think of me if I wasn't? Would you give me excuses to believe so that I can face myself in the mirror? Would you be disappointed, hoping that I, at least, would be the one to show the world that one can be of the world but not in it? "Oh, but she's human..."

Can you be true to yourself? Think about the times you gave in, stepped down, gave up the dreams, handed your life over the someone else, or gave your power to a system that sucked you in, sucked you dry, then told you it was your fault.

I could go on, but I'll stop here for now. Heavy stuff, eh? I'm loving this exploration - even the scary parts. So, what would you do if you really, really didn't care what others thought? Who would you be?

Let's Get Philisophical

Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand was published in 1957, and the philosophies are still discussed today in many circles. I had read it about ten years ago, after it sat on my shelf for about fifteen. For me it was an excellent read, though I struggled with much of the philosophy. I did take away the importance of self-love, self-respect, self-integrity, and self-value.

I've got about a hundred pages to go in this second read (it's over 1,100 pages of small print)and I don't understand all the points Ms. Rand is aspiring to make but I am getting much more out of it this time around.

Indoctrination is key throughout the story, and I think what I've chosen to believe as truth over the years is one reason I've tripped myself up in understanding Ms. Rand's views. Indoctrination can be defined as impressing on others something as true to obtain a particular behavior. These beliefs are accepted as "self-evident" by those who prefer to jump on board rather than think or do their own research.

Now, I know that I will not research every statement that comes my way, especially if it is of no concern to my immediate reality. But I am taking pause now to review some of the beliefs that I accepted because they "felt right", and shared them with others as truth, resulting in perpetuation of the indoctrination.

One of the key indoctrinations being challenged in Atlas Shrugged is the belief that the needy deserve to be considered and served first at all costs. My knee jerk is, of course, we are here to be of service. I am here to serve you. Being in service to others is noble and brings me closer to God. Where did these beliefs come from? And, are they true?

I provide a space called the Higher Self Bookstore providing access to books, goods and services to those who choose to explore, learn, and grow. I do my best to make sure the prices are fair, the quality is good, and the energy is positive. I love my "work." It is my responsibiity to keep the doors open.

Every day, without fail, I receive requests for donations. I feel guilty when I say no, and sometimes I feel resentful when I say yes. Where did these feelings come from? Is it that indoctrinated belief that I am my brother's keeper? What does that mean?

These are some of the questions I am asking myself as I try to understand Ayn Rand's philosophies. Some will read this and righteously proclaim me selfish to have such thoughts. Are we not here to explore and gain knowledge, especially about ourselves?

Imagine being absolutely sure in your beliefs, your purpose, your value. Imagine having the courage to change your own beliefs when new information is presented. Imagine a world of confident people who know their worth. Ah, what a feeling!

There is much to explore here so future blogs will include discussion as I ponder the philosophies of Ayn Rand. By the way, I have been feeling quite guilty about taking the time to read this book - when I could have been in working in order to serve others...now where did that come from?

More Baby Steps....

Let's talk more about baby stepping. In the last post I talked about baby steps vs. leaps and how both work in getting you to your goals.

I learned about visualization about twenty years ago, listening to a Jack Canfield tape, I believe. Then I learned about dream boards and setting intentions in personal growth courses. I would practice what I'd learned and sometimes I manifested what I wanted, and sometimes I didn't.

And then we all watched "The Secret." It was a wonderful reminder and triggered me to do additional research. I recognized that I needed to raise my vibration during visualization. Oh, and to feel good! Okay, a little more success.

My thirst for knowledge brought me through two manifesting programs in the last couple years that added neurological adjustment techniques, goal setting, and doing affirmations correctly. So, I got my meditations, my affirmations, my vision board, my story of my masterpiece of a life that I read over and over and over. I keep my vibration up, my brain linked, my picture perfect.....

I forgot the baby steps. I'm trying to get from where I am to where I want to be in one leap. Of course the perfect man for me is on my vision board - smiles, walking together, dancing, hugging, growing old together. But here's the kicker. I forgot to visualize "meeting someone", then "a date", then a "second date."

And there's my perfect body on the dream board - riding a bike, hiking, doing fancy yoga twists. I forgot to visualize buying a bike and putting the present body on it, or walking this present body around the block, or enrolling in a yoga class. My baby steps are missing.

Now, the baby steps are probably listed in the plans as things "to do." And they are still on the "to do" list because - I'm focused on the big picture and I forget to look at the list of things "to do."

Baby stepping in visualization is about being. It's about letting the Universe know what you want to experience now (like, a date!), and allowing that manifestation. If I'm looking off into the future, I'm going to miss that wink from across the room.

So today, I'm breaking it all down in my my visualization. I'm even picking just two or three manifests instead of all twenty-five "I've arrived" future items on my board. Letting the Universe know I'm ready and willing to meet the man, allowing the perfect bicycle to show up, and choosing to feel good instead of overwhelmed. Ah, what a great day!

Baby Step vs Leap

When my daughter (my constant teacher) decides she wants to change something, she usually takes baby steps to get there. One teenie action at a time. Now, for me, I'm the one standing back wondering why she doesn't Just Do It! Take the Leap! No, it's "baby steps, Mommy (she still calls me Mommy - she's 26), baby steps."

Recently I've stepped back to analyze this process versus the process that others choose, including myself. What prompted me was looking at the long list of things I wanted to change and accomplish and being overwhelmed with where to start. Baby Steps? Leap? Both?

It became clear to me that some things needed preparation (steps) before the leap. And some situations begged for a leap, then action in followup steps. For instance, you decide you want to sell your house. Now action must be taken to bring that manifestation to fruition - do you take baby steps or do you leap? If your neighbor and best friend lives next door, you can have her over for a glass of wine and ask her to bring over the appropriate documents along with a For Sale Sign out of her trunk. Leap. If not, it is best you use some discernment as you research and interview for an agent that is a match with you. Baby Step/Baby Step/Leap.

Or, you may take a look around and think that the house needs a lot of work before you can sell it. (read numerous baby steps here) Now, this is very workable as you hold the intention of selling in mind, but there is a danger. Focusing on the work instead of the intention, the goal.
If your intention is not clear, or you have a fear of succeeding, you could be taking baby steps indefinitely, going in circles, creating more and more Baby Steps to take to avoid taking that Leap!

There's really no right or wrong way to do this. It is all about what works best for you! Which way lights you up? Do you love to plan? Are you adding Baby Steps to avoid the Leap? Does the Leap thrill you, and you handle the steps later? Do what feels powerful.

What I know for sure, if it's too hard - I won't do it. That's when I practice Baby Steps. Unless, of course, I don't. That's when I take the Leap - just to get it done! If I need to learn before I jump in, Baby Steps. When I've taken all the Baby Steps I can, I'm at the edge, and I need a push - I ask for it.

As for my list, I've noted that there are some things on it that have been there for years. It's time I quit baby stepping and take the plunge - Just Do It! Here I go................

P.S. My daughter, Anna, just read this before I posted. She explained that, for her, it's like walking. She likes to make sure one foot is planted before taking the next step so she's remains - upright! Like, that step is established and secure, then moving on. And, "Mom," she said, "I have taken Leaps!" I said usually, honey, usually.

Unless - A Manifesting Mishap

How does one say “Yes” to possibilities, and still be impeccable with ones word? How does one manifest purposefully and powerfully, yet not get attached to the results? I don’t think I can answer all these questions today, but I’ll keep you posted as I work it out.

Today I want to look at one way we self-sabotage our manifestations, our intentions and dreams, by the thoughts we have upon declaration of those desires. The unconscious or subconscious thoughts that confuse the Universe about what we really want.

One conversation:

I’m going to Sedona in October with my women’s group.
(unless they all back out)
I don’t have the money yet, but I know it’s coming.
(unless it doesn’t, or I have to pay bills with it, or the car breaks down)
I’m going to hike to the vortexes in the Red Rocks.
(unless I break my leg, or get sick)
I’m going to stay in a wonderful timeshare resort.
(unless there are none available and I have to stay in a dump)

I call this the “unless” conversation that usually happens in the subconscious, but you may notice the thoughts coming up for you if you are aware and truly listening to yourself talk to yourself. This establishes the limitations even before they have an opportunity to show themselves from the unconscious part of you.

Another conversation:

I’m going to Sedona in October with my women’s group! I am so excited!
I have the money! Not in my bank account, but I know I have it! I’m so grateful!
I’m going to hike to the vortexes! I’m getting in shape now and I feel great!
I’m staying in a wonderful timeshare resort with a pool, Jacuzzi, kitchen, comfortable beds, located close to everything I want to see and experience! This is going to be an awesome trip – I feel like I’m there already!

This is a much more powerful conversation. In this conversation, “unless” thoughts may surface, but I recognize them as my own creation and let them go; release them to allow my intended creation to become a reality. And, very importantly, I maintain a vibration of feeling good, being excited, and having the feelings of already being there. In this high vibration I visualize what it is a say I want. Then I take action.

So I ask you to notice what you think when you go for it, whatever “It” is! Do you have thoughts that begin with Unless, If, As Long As? How do you feel when you have these thoughts? What do you do once you are aware of these thoughts and feelings? Let me know and we’ll pick up this conversation then. Namaste’

I Yelled, and Lived

I yelled at someone, and the earth did not crack open under my feet and swallow me up. I yelled, and lightning did not strike me dead from the heavens. I yelled, and no one got hurt, no one bled, no one got mad or declared revenge. I yelled, and I lived to tell you about it.



I don't yell. I rarely raise my voice. Well, except with my daughter but not so much now that she's grown. It's that indoctrinated thing about how a mom should be. Hard to break, even through enlightenment and knowledge that in most cases it is the ego wanting to manipulate the child into doing what the mother wants........whole other post.



In my younger (much younger) years, raising my voice was disrespectful, or so I was told. Projecting my voice would often be misinterpreted as hurtful and mean. I didn't understand it, but I did learned to control the tone, or keep my mouth shut. More often than not, I kept my mouth shut.



When I yelled and didn't die, I wasn't angry. I wanted to be heard. I had something to say, some new information that would change the direction of the current discussion, which was at the moment being conversed in raised voices. I was right, this time, and we all became more productive toward our goal, in a peaceful and loving manner.



So, when have you not yelled or raised your voice to be heard? Have you ever not raised your voice to say the one thing that could bring peace to the situation, because you believed that yelling or speaking loudly was not peaceful, loving, respectful, or may be detrimental to your current well-being - like being struck by lightning?



I yelled, and every day since my mind and my heart remind me that I yelled and lived to tell the story. This reminder nudges me to take a really good, deep look at this part of myself. And I wonder, where have I not yelled when yelling was exactly what was needed to be the catalyst toward peace?



And I now promise to raise a passionate voice, with love - sometimes called yelling.

Is It Me? Is It You? or Is It Memorex?

Last week I had the opportunity to experience an extreme energy in my body for one full day and half the next. My mind wanted to label it anxiety attack, not knowing what else to call it. Looking at all that was going on in my world and the lives of many close to me, I could gather evidence to support this theory. I thought "maybe I'm being gifted with anxiety so I can have empathy with them."

Later, I thought "or, maybe I've been gifted empathy, which is causing me to experience the anxiety of those around me", thinking empathy was something I may have been lacking.

I did not like this feeling. I did not make it right or wrong, good or bad, I just stayed with it, flowed with it, was fascinated by it. In the safe place that is my Women's Empowerment Group, I powerfully spoke what was on my mind via email. Around the house, I kept my mouth shut, afraid of what might come out of it.

The next day I checked in with Daniele Devoe, reader/healer at the Higher Self. I asked her which interpretation was correct? She said - neither one! Daniele said I was experiencing a shift, an energetic/vibrational shift.

So, when have you made your feelings all about you, or all about them, when actually it was just - what it was? This time, it wasn't me, and it wasn't them, it just was what it was.

February - Where have all the resolutions gone?

Typically, many resolutions have bit the dust, poofed into thin air, as if they never existed. But this is not true for us, is it? We know they are alive and just waiting for a little attention. Pick them up, dust them off and do a little review. Where are you in this intention? Maybe you made a little progress and forgot, or gave up - too hard.

Don't make it so hard! Baby-steps! Lay out a plan to help ensure that you can stick to it. If your dream, your intention, is big enough it is worth the journey. Don't let it go just because you became distracted or disapointed.

This is an excellent time to reflect: How many times have I attempted this and failed? Do I really want it? These questions will lead to more questions and give you the opportunity to dig a little deeper, uncover some old issues that need a good look, a touch, a thank you, and a toss out the door.

We often don't truly recognize the progress we've made in the shadow of what we didn't do. Congratulate yourself for these! Celebrate them!

For those of you who simply forgot what you wanted, may I suggest - Post Its!