Now, I did not plan to practice what I preach. I did not intend to sit around feeling bad. I did not set out to prove a point, to you or to myself. This "Part Two" was not on a list of things I'd like to write about in the future. But I must admit, I spent a good portion of this past month in and around feeling bad. I think because in some way, it felt good.
What prompted me to write more on this subject was references in my recent reality about the Dark Side, Shadow Work, and going through hell to get to heaven. Yes! That's it!
I spent much of April being in a low place, like a "shadowland", sitting and waiting for "what next?" Like watching a soap opera and becoming addicted, rushing home at the end of the day (if I bothered to leave the house, that is) to sit on the couch and wait and watch. Then I participated in the reviews and ratings. There has been a whole lot of drama at my house lately, and I got caught up in it (yes, I knew I shouldn't but I did anyway).
I even tried to direct some of the scenes myself, suggesting more enlightened alternatives to the scripts being played out. I discovered that I really have very little influence from the low place I was in. It's about vibration, vibration, vibration!
That was an aha moment, but that's not the only one. I learned the subtleness of drama, drama I had never recognized before - very sneaky stuff! I woke up and noticed where I was and what I was up to. Then decided to stay a couple days longer because it really was quite fascinating to me! I opened up, sat up, took notes, and was able to get many aha moments: remembering who I am, remembering that I CAN consciously create my day and not just sit and see what my unconscious brings to me -surprises not of my preference, one right after the other. More, much more - glad I visited hell to get to heaven.
I had had a type of Dark Night, walked through my own hell, dwelled in the shadowland of low vibration. I do believe I came out Lighter than when I went in. There are many books and resources about the "Shadow" and getting to know our shadow-selves will serve us by helping us recognize the shadow, love the shadow, but not let the shadow lead and repeat the patterns that limit us.
About a week ago I intentionally started to raise my vibration. I let people around me know that that was what I was up to so they could write me out of their drama scripts. And I invited those people to come along! There are enough soap opera stars in the world and we don't have to be one of them.
By one ticket to Shadowland, get two tickets to Paradise! Free! Thanks for reading.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
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