I Don't Know

When are you closing on the store?

I don’t know.

Are you going to Gem Show in October?

I don’t know.

What are you going to do after you sell the store?

I don’t know.

Are you going to teach?  Write a book?  Do a blog?

I don’t know.

Are you going to stay in Traverse City?

I don’t know.

Yes, I find myself saying “I don’t know” quite a lot these days.  Actually, I’ve been practicing being okay with “not knowing” for a number of years, now.  Used to be I’d feel guilty for not knowing the answer to a question – as if I should know!  I’d even make up answers, offering several replies that might fit into what the asker wanted to hear.  I aimed to please, after all.

Now, at the Higher Self Bookstore, if we don’t know something we do offer to find out.  We do our research and are prepared the next time the question comes up.  We are committed to being knowledgeable to better serve our visitors. 

Have you ever had someone get mad at you for not knowing the answer to something?  Or, seem pleased that you don’t know and they do?  These are people who think they “need to know”, or want to impress you with what they “do know.”  Knowing is a way of determining self-worth, and showing others that they have value.  Or, they are just very, very curious people.

Want to know a good reply to questions that seem to come out of the blue?  Or, you’re not sure you want to answer?  Try this, “Why do you ask?”  At the very least, you get some clarity.

If the topic is something that interests me, and I don’t know the answer, I will pursue that knowledge.  If it has to with trivia that doesn’t interest me, I don’t.

Now, back to the questions written at the beginning of this post.  Would I like to know the answers – Yes!  Am I going to pursue the answers?  No, not at this time.  I am learning that it is okay not to know, to trust that when it is time for me to know, I will.  The answers will be revealed to me in Divine time.  This is not always easy – I like instant gratification as much as the next person.

My job right now is to stay the course, be aware and awake for necessary detours, and take care of business along the way.  To stay in the present moment and let that moment bring to me what it is I need to know right now.  It’s a good practice – I highly recommend it!