May I?

Ah, Spring!  It's May (well, tomorrow) and I don't know about you but I feel like I've been given permission to do, do, do!  As in...

May I put the snow shovels away?  Yes I May!
May I rake the leaves now? Yes I May!
May I put my winter coats and heavy sweaters away?  Yes I May!
May I Spring clean now? Yes I May!
May I start stocking the store for the warm weather visitors?  Yes I May!

This reminds me of times I did not receive permission...from myself.

May I buy a new coat?  No, you must spend your money only on necessities.  Besides, it still keeps you warm and, hey, you really haven't earned a new coat, have you?  So, no.

Sometimes I put up a fight.

Look!  I've lost a lot of weight and this coat is too big and it is, after all, 16 years old!!!  No, I'm sorry, there are lots of starving children in China who do not have a coat.  You must learn to appreciate what you do have and be grateful.

I did not get a new coat.

Do you wait around for permission to fulfill your heart's desire?  Are you working on your worthiness to deserve what you say it is you want?  How often do you tell yourself "no", "never", "can't", "not yet."  Of course, there will be times when the practical, rational decision is "not yet."

Practice noticing when you deny yourself.  Dig a little under the surface objections.  Then go a little deeper still.  If you find some old baggage that doesn't serve you any more, find a way to get rid of it.  Set yourself free so you can say "Yes!" way more often than "no."

It may feel like the Universe has opened up and given me permission to move forward to do what I want to do, even go after my dreams.  I know what really happened - I kicked the baggage to the curb and gave myself a great big "YES!"

You can, too!  Spring clean that "stuff" you've been holding on to, that baggage inside of you.  We'll do it together.  Happy Spring!  And the season of  - yes I MAY!

What Brings You Joy?

What brings you joy?  This is a trick question, of course, because joy does not come to you.  Joy is not brought to you.  It's not laid out on a buffet in different flavors, shapes and sizes.

Yes, you can find yourself, or put yourself, in situations where it is easy to create the emotion of joy.  You can seek out or re-create the setting where you easily experienced joy in the past.  But still, the truth is, you chose joy - joy didn't choose you.

Thinking about joy this morning - and I don't know why I was thinking about joy this morning - I asked myself why, if I am at choice, did I not choose joy more often?  Of course, I would definitely benefit from being more joyful.  And wouldn't those around me also benefit if I was "being" more joy-filled?

Yesterday I was depressed.  I didn't consciously choose to be depressed.  Somewhere along the way I had trained my subconscious to create the feelings of depression when certain situations occurred.  Awakening to this awareness, I can now take conscious steps in re-training my subconscious.  How will I do that?  Awareness is key, so I will be vigilant in noticing when this happens and shift my thoughts and choose to feel something different.  I'll do some prep work through meditation and self-hypnosis.

Being depressed is not my emotion of preference.  I am leery of trying to cover up an unwanted emotion with a pseudo "happy" feeling.  There's a lesson in the depression and I want answers, so I usually stick with it awhile to see what comes up.  I want my reward!

We have been programmed from early on to respond with actions and feelings to our environment.  We can re-program ourselves to respond and feel differently, in a way we prefer, with a little work.  There are many tools and trainings, books and teachers - including your inner teacher - to help us with this shift in ourselves.

Well, I've got work to do - and so do you!  Don't be afraid to ask for help.  We at the Higher Self Bookstore have many resources - one that's perfect for you!

Success and Duality

Success.  It seems a rather ambiguous term to me.  I looked both “success” and “ambiguous” up in the dictionary.  Ambiguous means having two or more meanings.  Success is having a favorable outcome or result.  The Higher Self Bookstore has succeeded in keeping its doors open throughout the economic downslide as well as the most recent unfavorable weather that kept lots of people at home.

Success can also mean the gaining of wealth, fame, etc.  I cannot claim success by that definition.  Like most things, the meaning of what is gets to be quite personal. 

One of my favorite quotes from Conversations with God by Neale Donald Walsch is “There is something I don’t know here, the knowing of which can change everything!”  Some things I have learned recently (often kicking and screaming):

I am powerful and powerless at the same time.

I am wealthy and yet have no money, at the same time.

My surrender does not allow for doing nothing.

I am a success and a failure at the same time.

I can be very focused and quite blind at the same time.

Oh, there’s more, but you can get the picture.  Duality Reality! Depending on where I put my attention is the reality I experience in that moment.  That and there is where I make a choice.

Like I said, the Higher Self Bookstore has been very successful in keeping the doors open to serve you, either with the books and products you desire or with services to counsel and assist you in your personal and spiritual growth.  Even as a place just to breathe, find some peace, maybe even a hug, a smile, a laugh.

What we haven’t been successful in is being able to expand our services to you.  To keep the latest and greatest books and products on the shelves, fulfill special orders timely, or create an online store for our out-of-town or snowed in customers.  Our computer is antiquated, as is our web site. The store itself could use new carpeting, the walls painted, etc.  We haven’t failed – we just haven’t succeeded in those goals yet!

There are the facts to consider, but we get to choose the meaning of how those facts affect our reality.  We are all a success!  That’s how I see it.  I look forward to serving you successfully today, tomorrow, and in the years to come!  How I serve and where I serve may be different, but I will never fail in my commitment to make a difference.

Love - Then and Now

Who Is She?

She’s always been near,

No doubt she exists.

She swims in a tear,

And lives on a kiss.

Her home is the heart.

Two hands she will hold

And cling ere they part

When sweet words are told.

She sings in an ear,

She puts gleam in eyes,

In dreams she’ll appear

And sweeten the sighs.

She freshens the tone,

In songs, she sings of...

She plays not alone,

She’s known as .......... 

She's knows...LOVE!  I wrote this poem as a teenage.  Ha!  What I didn't know then that I know now.   Then, it was reading articles in teen magazines on how to get a guy to like you.  Then, it was figuring out how to keep the guy. I don't know where I got the idea to be the girl he wanted me to be instead of the wonderful young girl I already was. Ah, the teenage pain of wanting to be loved.

I don't recall anyone teaching me to love myself first.  It may have been mentioned, in passing. Love someone and let someone love you.  That is what I remember.

I've mentioned before my favorite books, Conversations With God.  I went to a retreat with the author, Neale Donald Walsch, a few years ago.  I raised my hand and asked him to expand on a quote from the book, Book One I believe - when faced with a decision to be made, "What would love do?"  He looked at me closely and said something along the lines of "you are wanting to make choices with your love for another, right?"  I agreed. Then he said, "You must first ask yourself - What would love for ME do?"

I said, "Oh."

I had never really thought of that.  How strange!  I always put someone else first in my decision making.  It was "bassackwards!"  And, a hard habit to break.  I practice...practice...practice.

So, not exactly a romantic love story, but an important one.  Be your own Valentine!  Fall in love with yourself!  This is the best Valentine's gift you can give to yourself, and everyone - yes, everyone else.

New Year Happy?

Happy New Year!  I’m sure you are expecting lots of positive clichés, so here they are:  It’s a time of new beginnings!  Out with the old, in with the new!  Make those resolutions and stick to ‘em!  The past is past, it’s a new day, a new year!  Create a ‘Dream Board’ for 2014!  What do you want to manifest this year?!

Okay, now that that’s done, I’m going to share a little of my reality.  The thought of adding anything new to my plate is simply exhausting.  What I really want for 2014 for myself is some happy endings.  It’s been a year of extremes.  Some very, very dark as well as some very, very bright and joyful.

The more I ponder “new beginnings”, the more the “unfinished business” comes to the forefront of my mind.  I’m finding it impossible to step into the delight of creating something new in my reality.  This is quite puzzling, but I’m starting to get a glimmer into how I can make this work for me.  I want the delight!

What I can do, and will do, is take a fresh, new look at what is in my reality right now.  Just maybe, I can “begin” again, create something “new” out of what can become old.  I can create my own happy endings and make room for some new possibilities.

I’m remembering that I am at choice in my labeling and how I believe the story will play out.  I decide what is old and what’s new.  I decide what is ‘an ending’ and what is a beginning.  I decide what is dark and what is light.

I’m deciding to have a marvelous, prosperous, joyful, peace-filled 2014.  What are you deciding?

Ah, I feel better.  I hope you do, too!  Thank you for letting me share, for letting me be real with you.  May all you desire manifest at great speed in the New Year, 2014.

Are You Serious? The Universe Wants to Know!

The Law of Attraction is alive and well.  Of course, it always was, always is, and always will be, whether we believe in the Laws of the Universe or not. "The Secret" introduced many to these Laws and some of us became conscious of how to use those Laws, and some of us played with it a bit then said "Phooey!"

I am a firm believer in the Laws, I just tend to get lazy, or disappointed when what I want doesn't show up right away - maybe discouraged is a better word. This is the problem with most of us, I think, in manifesting what we desire. Patience.

When you visit the Higher Self Bookstore, you will notice that we do everything by hand.  Book titles are written down on a yellow pad at time of sale, we search 3X5 cards to see if a book is in stock, we are still handwriting gift certificates, and there is a standard cash register.  I wanted to offer more to my customers.

I wanted a POS system.  POS stands for Point of Sale.  With a point of sale we could scan products for faster check out, record your purchases for loyalty programs, issue gift cards, and generate reports and orders and such to get me out of the office and visiting with you out in the store! And so much more!

In 2009, I almost committed to the purchase of a POS.  Luckily, my bookkeeper stopped me.  We really (really!) couldn't afford it.  I still wanted one, and for the next four years I desired, wished, wanted one.  I could even whip up the excitement the owning of one would have for me.

But this is only part of the Law of Attraction equation.  What I was missing was action.  I had in my head an already knowing of how much it cost and that it was out of my reach.  Over the last month I finally started working on a business plan - something I didn't really think I needed because I had it all in my head and why put it on paper for others to read?  Please list this under denial, laziness, and procrastination. 

Writing about my mission was easy.  Coming up with the numbers, not so much.  As I took action and started getting new quotes for POS systems, as well as new website, online store costs, etc., it actually felt good to know, really know, so I could continue to take steps from there. It included talking to actual people, too, instead of just the voice in my head. People who knew other people who were just waiting for me.  Just waiting.

So, the reason for this topic this month is - Law of Attraction works when you work it!  I'm so excited I've been jumping up and down all day! The Higher Self is getting a POS system!  Affordable and awesome!  Just wait until you see all we will be able to offer you!  I can hardly wait!

I think the Universe was waiting around to see if I was serious.  That is where the action part is so important.  Well, just as important as the desire and the feeling - you gotta give it all!  Wishin' and a-hopin' and thinkin' ain't gonna work - unless it does but those cases are rare.

Speaking of manifesting, there's a class here on January 11th on the Law of Attraction, offering you tools to make your desires a reality.  The tools won't do the work it for you, of course.

Wishing you all that you desire, this holiday season and all the days of your life!

Tis the Season - The Truth About It

Tis the Season of Holidays.  This week we take down the Halloween decorations and spruce up with fall colors and symbols of the harvest in preparation for Thanksgiving.  Already there are Christmas decorations, as well as Christmas music, in many of the stores (not at the Higher Self Bookstore)! 

We take a moment, sometimes a very short moment, to honor and contemplate the meaning of the season and the holiday.  Too often it is short-lived and we are distracted by the list of things to do that we’ve made for ourselves.  Busy, busy, busy.

I find myself taking on the responsibility of making sure those around me can be joyous, peaceful, comfortable and well fed, imaging I’m the only one who can do it.  I’m the only one who knows that my holiday company can only feel these things I desire for them if I deep clean, wash the glassware to a sparkle, plan the menu, shop for the best deals so there’s money available for some special treats, and coordinate my dates and times around everyone else so there is no stress and all can come and experience the joy and comfort I have prepared for them.

Am I listening to myself?  How arrogant to think only I know what will make you happy!  As I make myself crazy, you are sitting back without a clue as to what has gotten into me!  I’m guessing I am not the only one who puts themselves in this position.

I know it is “I” who feels more comfortable if the glasses sparkle.  It is “I” who feels good being able to give special gifts.  I am the one who enjoys cleaning and cooking for company.  Yep, it's all about me.  Unless, of course, it isn't.  Truth be said, when I remember that these things are not a “have to”, that I actually do it for the joy of it, this hostess is not crazy and nicer to be around.

I invite you to join me in doing it a little differently this year.  If doing a thing does not bring you joy, consider dropping it from your list or finding someone else to do it, someone who does find joy in it.  Dig for the truth of it:  the preparations and the gift giving, do I really have to or do I want to.

Make those moments of honor and contemplation stretch out longer, maybe do a little research to share with your holiday companions.  Create an environment of joy and peace, from the inside out.  Being joy and peace invites those around you to Be the same.

Breathe!  Make it fun!  Give the gift of peace, joy, and love – yours!