There's a Fine Line

As you know, there is sometimes a very fine line between living in your day consciously or unconsciously, intentionally or unintentionally. When I am teaching, one word you'll hear me say repeatedly is "notice." When you "notice" what the thoughts are going through your head, you bring yourself back to a conscious state and can ask yourself the (sometimes hard) questions, like: Why am I thinking that? What's really going on with me? Is it true?

I'm an observer, and a darn good one. There was a time in my life, though, that being an unconscious observer was how I avoided really living. I spent much of my time watching others do, play, work, and grow. I took notes, but never really jumped into the game. It was safer to sit back as a spectator and just do what absolutely had to be done, that which was required of me. I kept my emotions in check, and spoke little (unless I was with friends and felt safe - but even then....).

Now that I am aware of what I was up to I can check in with myself, notice, if I am repeating an unconscious way of being, or if I am being an observer intentionally. Like I said, I am a very good conscious observer. I can view what's going on around me, assessing what is and isn't, and deciding what needs to be done - without letting my emotions take over.

The unconscious observer can get very good at burying, hiding, and denying feelings, often appearing cold, distant, and unemotional. The conscious observer may appear exactly the same way. The difference is that the conscious observer recognizes and acknowledges their feelings and emotions, they just don't let them rule!

There are so many changes going on, many of which I do not prefer! Sudden illnesses, deaths, and losses, in my own family and around the world. I find it necessary to "notice" and check in on myself several times a day. It's what I've practiced - and I'm so glad I did. I want to be fully aware, fully conscious, Fully feeling, and fully intentional. I can't do that asleep, sleep-walking through my days. There's a fine line and I want to be on the intentional side of it!

There is a fine line between observing life as it passes you by and being awake to life with all its emotions. There's a fine line between being judgemental and using discernment, between performing for approval and behaving according to agreed upon expectations, between escaping into daydreams and consciously deciding where to put your attention, between being a know-it-all and being the best that you can be. And finally, being an exception to the rule because you feel you must and being an exceptional human being.

So notice! Write this word on sticky notes and place them...everywhere! Little reminders to be awake and intentional in your thinking and your actions. Practice. Get yourself a wake-up buddy! Life is so much better with eyes open...and focused!