I have often commented that I wanted to write a book on the dangers of personal growth. Really, there should be warnings before inquiring about oneself and the possibilities of being more. One of the chapters would be about how the people in your life will change -NOT.
When you wake up, even the least little bit, you will notice how the people around you are not the people they used to be. Especially the people close to you. Somehow they are different and you don’t recognize them as you used to. Of course, they didn’t change – you did.
When you were sleeping, you daydreamed how people were – usually the way you wanted them to be. Or expected them to be. Unconsciously, you decided what to see and what to be blind to.
I took a trip not too long ago with some people I used to travel with to Las Vegas. I’d been there with them before and had a good time. Once I got there it was like I didn’t know these people at all! These were acquaintances from my sleepwalking days.
I found myself switching back and forth between judging and being in fascination as fast as I could blink my eyes! I kept asking myself questions, like “Were they always like this?” “Did they always talk like this?” “Was I like this, am I still like this?”
Answering myself, I said, yes, they are the same as they always were. One man in particular, my host, spurred my own soul searching the most. In our past, I had been quite impressed with his self-confidence, how he carried himself, how he seemed to make others take notice of him, that he was free with his money. My dream man!
The man in my wakened state was not so confident after all. In fact, it appeared to me that he tried to raise his self-esteem, make himself more important, by making himself big, and others small. I know he did not know, was not aware, that he was doing this. And I knew he did not want to know – not at this time or in this place.
He hadn’t changed. I had. My choice to become aware, to wake up to who I am and who I want to be has taken me down a path, a path I chose consciously. I encouraged others to come with me. I had encouraged him to come with me when I first started out. I thought he had tagged along, for a little ways, at least.
Not everyone you know and love will choose to walk the path with you. It’s okay, they are already on a path of their own choosing, and they just may not know it. Some will try to keep you from going down a path you chose, may even reach out to pull you back, because they know their life will change if you go. But you can never go back. Once you wake up, even a little, that part of you can never be put back to sleep again.
A personal growth trainer I worked with would get down sometimes after giving a three-hour free introductory course. She would be discouraged that people hadn’t signed up to continue the training, and she would feel sad that they apparently chose to not make a change, to not wake up. I would reminder her that each and every one of them had indeed made a change, had awakened – it was impossible not to, unless they had literally snored through the entire three-hour training. They knew too much now to ever be the same again.
Even your reading this now is an inquiry of your own to know more, to experience more, to be opened and awakened to new possibilities. And you will never be quite the same as you were.
The dangers of personal growth: You will change. Others may leave you, you may leave others. You will love and bless them, as I love and bless those from the Vegas trip.
The dangers of not seeking personal growth: You will change. Others may leave you, you may leave others. You will stay asleep and life will happen to you.
The good news is, when you seek to grow you will change purposefully. You will take your power back from wherever or whomever you gave it to. Be grateful that it was taken care of while you slept.
People may leave, but there are people just waiting to welcome you into your wakefulness.
I meet others on the path I chose and I keep their company. It is important for me to have their support, faith, and encouragement. There are hands out there reaching even now to pull me back, put me in the cubbyhole they think I should be in. I hold on tight to the hands that won’t let me go that gently push me forward.
There are dangers in personal growth. You will never be the same and you can never to back. Ah, but the rewards are eternal!
When you wake up, even the least little bit, you will notice how the people around you are not the people they used to be. Especially the people close to you. Somehow they are different and you don’t recognize them as you used to. Of course, they didn’t change – you did.
When you were sleeping, you daydreamed how people were – usually the way you wanted them to be. Or expected them to be. Unconsciously, you decided what to see and what to be blind to.
I took a trip not too long ago with some people I used to travel with to Las Vegas. I’d been there with them before and had a good time. Once I got there it was like I didn’t know these people at all! These were acquaintances from my sleepwalking days.
I found myself switching back and forth between judging and being in fascination as fast as I could blink my eyes! I kept asking myself questions, like “Were they always like this?” “Did they always talk like this?” “Was I like this, am I still like this?”
Answering myself, I said, yes, they are the same as they always were. One man in particular, my host, spurred my own soul searching the most. In our past, I had been quite impressed with his self-confidence, how he carried himself, how he seemed to make others take notice of him, that he was free with his money. My dream man!
The man in my wakened state was not so confident after all. In fact, it appeared to me that he tried to raise his self-esteem, make himself more important, by making himself big, and others small. I know he did not know, was not aware, that he was doing this. And I knew he did not want to know – not at this time or in this place.
He hadn’t changed. I had. My choice to become aware, to wake up to who I am and who I want to be has taken me down a path, a path I chose consciously. I encouraged others to come with me. I had encouraged him to come with me when I first started out. I thought he had tagged along, for a little ways, at least.
Not everyone you know and love will choose to walk the path with you. It’s okay, they are already on a path of their own choosing, and they just may not know it. Some will try to keep you from going down a path you chose, may even reach out to pull you back, because they know their life will change if you go. But you can never go back. Once you wake up, even a little, that part of you can never be put back to sleep again.
A personal growth trainer I worked with would get down sometimes after giving a three-hour free introductory course. She would be discouraged that people hadn’t signed up to continue the training, and she would feel sad that they apparently chose to not make a change, to not wake up. I would reminder her that each and every one of them had indeed made a change, had awakened – it was impossible not to, unless they had literally snored through the entire three-hour training. They knew too much now to ever be the same again.
Even your reading this now is an inquiry of your own to know more, to experience more, to be opened and awakened to new possibilities. And you will never be quite the same as you were.
The dangers of personal growth: You will change. Others may leave you, you may leave others. You will love and bless them, as I love and bless those from the Vegas trip.
The dangers of not seeking personal growth: You will change. Others may leave you, you may leave others. You will stay asleep and life will happen to you.
The good news is, when you seek to grow you will change purposefully. You will take your power back from wherever or whomever you gave it to. Be grateful that it was taken care of while you slept.
People may leave, but there are people just waiting to welcome you into your wakefulness.
I meet others on the path I chose and I keep their company. It is important for me to have their support, faith, and encouragement. There are hands out there reaching even now to pull me back, put me in the cubbyhole they think I should be in. I hold on tight to the hands that won’t let me go that gently push me forward.
There are dangers in personal growth. You will never be the same and you can never to back. Ah, but the rewards are eternal!
Thanks for reminding me that as I grow personally not all of my friends will stay connected with me. Their paths aren't crossing mine anymore but I will still remember with fondness our shared experiences.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your blog Ricki. It resonated so deeply with me that it brought me to tears. I am at a crossroads in my marriage and in my soul know that I need to move on. Your words encapsulated how I feel. I am awake, alive and truly feel love and care for ME! I can never go back asleep and can not stay in a relationship that is no longer for my highest good. Thank you again, your words were very powerful:) Kendra
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely amazing stuff! So very well written, so true and profound, yet easily understood. Interesting how simple truth can be. Thank you so much for putting this into words, the ever-changing journey that we all are on. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteThank you for reminding me to bless them as they travel their own path. Sometimes I judge them for not only being who they are but for not choosing to be on my path with me. I forget that they helped me to choose my path, nudged me and sometimes shot me like a pinball in that direction. And for that I am eternally grateful. My heart is full - lovepeacejoy, C
ReplyDelete