Dead Fish

"...and always remember my child...only dead fish go with the flow."  This is from one of my favorite greeting cards by Great Cosmic Happy Ass - a staple at the Higher Self Bookstore.  For many years now I have differentiated the phrases "Be in the flow" and "Go with the flow."  The dead fish statement is maybe a little strong (but it is funny), but makes the point that sometimes just going with the flow allows for non-action, non-commitment, and non-focus.  I'm not saying that I don't step into that river from time to time, but the intention I hold is to BE IN the flow.

Abraham (channeled by Ester Hicks) explains the difference, and adds that trying to paddle upstream, against the flow (of the Universe) will not bring to you what it is you truly want.  As I understand it, as I focus on what I want, be clear on what I want, the Universe will start the flow of what it is I say I want to me.  Yes, action is often required and as I am in the flow, the action required will be clear to me.

Sometimes being in the flow takes me gently, easily to my desires.  And then, there are those days where I feel like I am continuously bouncing into boulders!  Depending on my issue, there may be days and days, weeks, months even, when I keep crashing into boulders or skinning my knees on hidden rocks or just getting stuck.  Funny how many of these boulders look exactly alike.  Who the heck put all these obstacles in my way?  Why are they trying to sabotage my flow to my desires?

'Tis I, I know - it would be so much easier to blame someone else, though.  So I ask the boulder, "Hey, Boulder!  Just what is it you want me to get?  What is the lesson here?  Don't be making me try to paddle upstream!"  The boulder often doesn't answer.  So I push myself around it and, lo and behold!  There it is again!

There are no shortcuts.  The limitations I have put in front of me can only be removed by me.  I can ask for help, and I do, except when I don't.  Hey, maybe I like the colors of black and blue! Beating myself up only keeps me down, so I do the work.  We all have to do the work, eventually, I mean - isn't that why we are all here?  To remember who we are and create!

Don't be a dead fish.  That's my advice.  Me?  I'm gonna ride me some rapids!

Have You Ever Been Mellow...On A Treadmill?

The song has been playing in my head the past few days.  When I anticipate writing this blog at this time of the month, I pay closer attention to the voices in my head - thanks, Olivia!  I'm thinking this song is here because for the past few months, I've been wanting to write about being stuck on a treadmill - that's the word that keeps coming up for me, sad to say.

Have I Ever Been Mellow?  Well, of course!  From time to time, here and there, fleetingly, and, it's been a while.  Hmm.  Mellow for me means, calm and peaceful, quietly joyous. What stops me?  I don't even think I hold that as an intention these days.  I'm going to have to write Olivia Newton John a thank you card for reminding me what's been missing.

Now, I haven't been totally clueless.  Feeling stuck in the midst of an seemingly endless to-do list has brought about the vision of a hamster on a treadmill.  The thing is, I know better.  I just can't get off of it!  Maybe I'm afraid that if I do, the wheel would stop spinning and I wouldn't have fulfilled my promises to you, and you, and me.  You have expectations of me - keep the doors open, the shelves stocked, the floors clean, the events promoted, etc., etc. - and I love meeting those expectations!  I really do!

You've never been in this place, right?  You have?!?  Tell me, how did you get to be mellow on the treadmill?  Oh, I see.  You made time.  You made it important to be mellow, to meditate, to sit and breath, to have fun, to make the doing of the to-do list fascinating, a game.  It is all a game, isn't it?

Okay, I'm going to do it!  I'm going to change the channel on my "reality TV" and schedule only programs that lift my spirit, make me laugh, feed my soul, and air according to my own time schedule!  Thanks for the awesome advice!  I knew I could count on you!

It's Always Somethin'

Well, ain't it?  Always somethin'.  Just when I think I can relax a minute, the washing machine breaks, or the muffler falls off the car, or the kid left the peanut butter jar in the cupboard - with no peanut butter in it (I discover this as I'm putting the groceries away and, no, I didn't buy peanut butter 'cause there was a jar on the shelf).  Yes, you nod in agreement, it's always somethin'.

Seems everyone knows this little phrase, and like me, have believed it to be true.  If it is true, well, there is nothing we can do about it, right?  Where did it come from, anyway?  It sounds like one of those beliefs that have been passed down through generations.  Whether I heard it from Mom, or Grandma, or a teacher, or made it up - it's obvious to me that it is a cultural and societal and generic truth indoctrinated into my very life!  And very possibly - yours!

Note that "it's always somethin'" does not usually show itself in times of celebration!  When I hear good news, I don't think "it's always somethin'".  The "somethin'" is always negative, something I don't want but always seems to get.  Another somethin'.

Is this the belief that runs my life?  By believing "it's always somethin'", do I attract exactly that?  Is the somethin' directing the drama of my life?  Because I also believe that my beliefs create my life, the answer is a big ole "Yep!"  Truthfully, I recognized this about the thought "it's always somethin'" a couple years ago and have taken steps to dis-create it.  It's a stubborn one, though. Showed up this morning.  It helps to yell back at it when it shows up - that's not true!  It's a lie!  Still, I have more work to do on this one.

This is just one of many cultural, societal, generational beliefs that we all have been living with without awareness.  What are some others you might be holding onto?  Notice your thoughts.  Challenge them - is that true?  Really?

I've been writing about a new conversation on a bigger scale, one that's needed as we evolve into a New Beginning.  I have this image, though, of everyone going up to everyone and asking them if they believe "it's always somethin'?".  Then "Is It True?"  And then, "What do you think life would be like if it wasn't?"  Maybe, just maybe, the "somethin's" would transform into somethin' quite marvelous!

Keep talking, people!  A New Beginning awaits us, and there just isn't any room for the "somethin's".

Is It Enough To Just Be?

At first, absolutely no topic of inspiration was coming to me.  Then, too many to choose from were there in my head.  But also in my head were all the things I needed to do besides blog.  On top of that, I don't know what's going on - the alignment of the planets, one getting ready to pass between Earth and the Sun, Solar Eclipses, Lunar Eclipses - or maybe I'm just going crazy, as are some of the people around me, but suddenly I can't add numbers, can't focus, can't make a decision, doubt my decisions, and get too easily drawn into others' drama!  I told the others at the Higher Self Bookstore that we needed to start wearing aluminum foil caps to reflect the planetary craziness!  But I digress...

I was sad this past weekend, the one year anniversary of my Mom's transition.  But more fascinating to me was that I had a hard time not dwelling on the end days, which were not pleasant (a nice way of saying painful).  I had to consciously go into my memory for the good times, the laughter, and the sweetness of my experiences with my Mom. I'm counting on time to heal this.

There is a school of thought that if we, individually, would learn to be peaceful within ourselves, practice loving ourselves and others, and recognize that we are one and living our best life - that we would automatically bring peace, love, and oneness to the world.  I've been questioning if this is really enough at this point in our existence on this home we call Earth.

At my last women's group, we discussed the various religions and the various religions within the religions.  Example, just how many different Christian religions or churches are there?  Why are there so many?  Why don't some of them get along? Why don't some of them play nice with those of other religions. It is the same for all of them - they all branched out based on - well, I'm guessing it had as much to do with belief choices as it did with community choices, but I don't really know.

So, thinking of Mom, it occurred to me that if my sister and I hadn't had conversations about what we believed with Mom, Mom may not have had an opportunity to explore with us, to find another way of looking at things.  Mom was raised Christian, but that didn't stop her from being judgmental and miserable. Mom finally took the same personal growth courses we had and was able to look at things differently and find more peace in her life.  I like to believe she created an even closer relationship with Jesus by letting go of the "what's right" and "what's wrong" of her earlier upbringing.

Cindy (my sister) and I were "being" different after taking the courses.  We were happier, more at peace with ourselves, more open and loving to others, more calm in the midst of chaos and drama.  Our lives were changing as a result and it all looked pretty darn good!  If we hadn't been "being" and expressing ourselves in a new way, Mom would probably not have listened.  Just imagine my being judgmental, angry, and miserable while telling Mom I knew a way for her to bring more joy and peace into her life.  Dah!

Now, we could have kept our mouth's shut - saying, "Oh, she won't understand.  Mom's just Mom.  Let her believe what she wants to believe."  I'm glad we didn't.

Maybe it isn't enough to just "be" peaceful, loving, and quiet.  With all that's going on here and now, we need to have a conversation.  Many conversations.  We can't know for sure who is ready to listen and who isn't. Not unless you speak.

What do you know that they don't know that may change -everything?  What might they know that you don't that just might change - everything?  "Be the change you want to see in the world." (I think that was Ghandi?)  Then, talk about it!  Start talking even if you think you can't "be" the change you want to see in the world, yet.

I'm going to sign off for now and go enjoy my new sanity, which looked a lot like insanity yesterday.  I apologize if this blog seems a little scattered - I can see the connections and I hope you do, too. Now, if I could just find my new (tin foil) hat..........

A Persisent Question, Number 1

As I pondered what to post, remembering that I intended to do a series on the questions posed in The Storm Before the Calm by Neale Donald Walsch, I learned that bombings occurred in Kabul just 90 minutes after President Obama departed after meetings.  You know, we've been talking about how change is happening rapidly in our lives - but some things appear to not be changing much at all.  Like political campaign ads.  I mean really, has anyone heard anything new?  Has the platform changed?  I'm not seeing it.  But I digress...

"How is it possible that 6.9 billion people claim to want the same thing (peace, security, opportunity, prosperity, happiness, and love) and  be singularly unable to get it?"

For one, we keep doing what we've always done and expect different results.  I know you've heard this before.  Until we stop and take a look at our beliefs, our "cultural" stories, our history, and whether or not our actions match our intentions - we will continue to get what we've always got.

I was also reminded of an article I wrote a few years ago.  It adds more questions I hope you "conversate" with others about.  I edited the length.
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Lessons on the Beach

 Listening to the waves was nourishing to my body and soul, digging my feet into the sand connected me to mother earth and grounded me at the same time.  But it was the words I heard spoken by the friends, intentionally and unintentionally, that I took home as true treasures.  Words I could feed on and digest and apply to life.  Lessons on the beach.

At lunch with a friend yesterday, these questions were posed to me:  What causes a person to be civilized? What causes a person to be uncivilized?  As I pondered these excellent questions, he asked, “Well, do you have an answer?”

Yes, of course, love and fear is at the base of every chosen action or way of being.  I am assuming we are using the same definition of civil, meaning what we in America consider civil behavior.  What other countries call civil may be viewed as uncivil by our standards.  Honor, peace, respect, dignity, and other sub-definitions of love could be the causes for civil behavior.  These same aspects could come from a place of fear and cause uncivilized actions.

Not much later that day, I witnessed this same enlightened soul engage in loud, angry, mostly verbal battle on the beach with a complete stranger.  I didn’t, or wouldn’t, believe that any physical harm was going to result, so I did not intervene.  I had a sense that a great lesson was going on. 

When my friend returned to my side, defensive and angry and righteous, I calmly repeated his earlier questions – What causes a person to be civilized?  What causes a person to be uncivilized?

As he started in on what she had said and what she had done and how people should be this way and people should never…I interrupted with “This isn’t about her.  I want to know what ‘caused’ you to react the way you did?”

It took a very long walk down the beach and back to get to his underlying personal issues.  As we talked, I recalled the words I heard on another beach with another friend the previous week about conflict.  Her revelation was “I want what I want.”  And, the other person wants what they want.  Too often, all the individuals really want is to be “right.”

This morning the newspaper ran yet another article on the conflict between Israel and Palestine.  From a distance, we don’t understand why these two peoples can’t create peace from a place of love.  They choose, instead, to use intimidation, manipulation, threats, and violence.  Both sides believing they are right and acting out of righteousness.  This is similar to what I witnessed during the beach battle.  Both wanting what they wanted, both believing they were in the right.  First they tried intimidation.  Then manipulation.  When threats didn’t work, violence happened.

So, what causes you to be civilized?  What triggers you to be uncivilized?  Better yet, what do you want as your ‘cause’ to be either?  Will it be love, peace, honor, respect, dignity?  Is there a particular fear you are still holding on to that could cause you to be uncivil?  

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Share your thoughts with me, too!  Thank you for passing this forward so more can participate in the conversation.  Namaste'

Where Am I? And Why Am I Where I Am?

The second and third questions I'm asking myself are Where am I and Why am I where I am? These questions are presented in Neale Donald Walsch's latest book, The Storm Before the Calm. I already addressed Who I Am - a child of God, one with the Universe, a spiritual being having a human experience. So where am I?

Here. I'm here. And I'm there. I'm everywhere. I'm pure energy connected and in flow with all energy. I am you and you are me. I am here and you are here, I am there and you are there. Confused yet? I get this mostly as a concept, but have experienced (in what seems like small, fleeting moments) Being all that is and Being everywhere. Feels good, really good.

Have I ever told you my silly putty analogy? One day while contemplating the concept of "We Are One" I had an epiphany! Up until that moment I couldn't quite get it. If I was a part of the whole, I was still separate as a part. The jigsaw puzzle theory didn't work for me - I was still a separate piece. I could be willing to be of the "One", but was still removable, know what I mean?

Anyway, I pictured silly putty spread way out, really thin. I hope you all remember silly putty! Then I pictured using my finger to poke upward a silly putty me. I did it again, and that was me, too. Again and again. Silly putty me, and the rest were silly putty yous, which were actually me. I was everywhere! With absolutely no separation. We Are One!

Now I could look around at all the silly putty me's and say, "Wow, look what I am doing over there!", and over in another direction, "Fascinating the choices I'm making over yonder." In my daily reality, the "over theres" are You. Me being you. Of course, I forget that.

I recently had another "epiphany" around my silly putty analogy. Remember how you could take the silly putty, press it against a comic strip and create a "copy?" That's what I did. I put a "face" on all the finger beings I created- You now have a face! Ha! My illusion, my show!

What was the questions? Oh, yeah, Where Am I? My conscious human self is in Traverse City, Michigan, United States, Earth, Universe. I am in the Higher Self Bookstore at this moment - at least that is where my focus is. Talking to you, out there everywhere, where I am as well just not feeling it at the moment. Words are so limiting, aren't they?

Why Am I Where I Am? I figure there's got to be a good reason. I need to go a little deeper, but not just yet.

I attended a retreat with Neale Donald Walsch some time back. One wonderful thing I took away from that experience was this: "You are in the room to heal the room." I'm sure it is in one of his Conversations with God books, but I remember it from the gathering. To me this means that wherever I am (in a room, a park, a convention, a friends house, a family reunion), I am there to do what I can to raise my vibration and the vibration of those around me. To bring in positivity where there is negativity. To make the "room" and those in it feel better.

More on these questions and the next question in my next blog. My women's group has already started discussing the questions. If you are interested in meeting for A New Conversation, let me know and we will plan a get-together! And feel free to leave comments here. Namaste'

Can We Have a New Conversation?

Neale Donald Walsch's latest book, The Storm Before the Calm, was on my "to read" list, having to do with 2012 and how we can be proactive in our collective future. I'm a big fan of Neale's works, all of them, the Conversations with God series being my "go to" books for answers, inspiration, peace, love - and remembering who I am.

My sister, Cindy, received The Storm Before the Calm as a birthday present in January. Her friend also told her about a group in her area meeting to have "conversations." She called me very excited about the book and the group, so I brought the book home the next day. On the cover reads "Conversations with Humanity."

Neale encourages us to ask ourselves seven questions, and have conversations with others about these topics. He presents the questions as early as pages 43 and 44. When I first read them, my reaction was "Oh, hell no, I do not want to go there." Which is exactly why I am going to go there. It's time to dig deeper. We all could use a deeper dig. In fact, I believe our future depends on a deeper dig.

My women's group is going to work the book and the questions. I am considering having the Higher Self Bookstore host a "conversation" group. You may want to join in right away, so I am going to share four of the questions with you now:

1. Who am I?
2. Where am I?
3. Why am I where I am?
4. What do I intend to do about that?

Who am I? I answer this without labels, such as mother, store owner, daughter, woman, feminist, writer, artist, cook, housekeeper, blahblahblah. I am Divine, a child of God, I am spirit now having an human experience, I am God individuated. I forget this as I am doing all the things my "labels" seem to require of me. And like many of my neighbors, local and globally, I have been very, very busy focusing my attention on survival. Except when I'm not. It has been way too easy to forget who I am.

But now, as encouraged, I ask my self that question everyday and am automatically reminded who I am. Wow, this conversation has already changed my life! I am also going to the web site to participate in conversations there, http://www.TheGlobalConversation.com

What impresses me about the "Occupy" movement is that conversations are happening. It may not be clear what the solutions are, but with enough people talking to each other and sharing what they know, answers can be developed, declared, and demanded. We can go even bigger.

We are going through many changes and we feel we have no control over the future. We are way more powerful than we think. As the line goes in an Indiana Jones film (something like) It's Time to Ask Yourself What It Is You Believe.

If you are interested in participating in the "conversation" at the Higher Self Bookstore, send us an email and let us know: higherselfbooks@aol.com

As I dig into my own answers deeper, I promise to share them with you. I'd love to hear your answers as well. Let's talk - it's important, and it just may be our saving grace.

Why this book, and why these questions and not some other? It is the one before me, it talks to me, I can relate and connect. Neale's has laid out some great guide lines, and has "started" the conversation, and it's a good one!