I Don't Know

When are you closing on the store?

I don’t know.

Are you going to Gem Show in October?

I don’t know.

What are you going to do after you sell the store?

I don’t know.

Are you going to teach?  Write a book?  Do a blog?

I don’t know.

Are you going to stay in Traverse City?

I don’t know.

Yes, I find myself saying “I don’t know” quite a lot these days.  Actually, I’ve been practicing being okay with “not knowing” for a number of years, now.  Used to be I’d feel guilty for not knowing the answer to a question – as if I should know!  I’d even make up answers, offering several replies that might fit into what the asker wanted to hear.  I aimed to please, after all.

Now, at the Higher Self Bookstore, if we don’t know something we do offer to find out.  We do our research and are prepared the next time the question comes up.  We are committed to being knowledgeable to better serve our visitors. 

Have you ever had someone get mad at you for not knowing the answer to something?  Or, seem pleased that you don’t know and they do?  These are people who think they “need to know”, or want to impress you with what they “do know.”  Knowing is a way of determining self-worth, and showing others that they have value.  Or, they are just very, very curious people.

Want to know a good reply to questions that seem to come out of the blue?  Or, you’re not sure you want to answer?  Try this, “Why do you ask?”  At the very least, you get some clarity.

If the topic is something that interests me, and I don’t know the answer, I will pursue that knowledge.  If it has to with trivia that doesn’t interest me, I don’t.

Now, back to the questions written at the beginning of this post.  Would I like to know the answers – Yes!  Am I going to pursue the answers?  No, not at this time.  I am learning that it is okay not to know, to trust that when it is time for me to know, I will.  The answers will be revealed to me in Divine time.  This is not always easy – I like instant gratification as much as the next person.

My job right now is to stay the course, be aware and awake for necessary detours, and take care of business along the way.  To stay in the present moment and let that moment bring to me what it is I need to know right now.  It’s a good practice – I highly recommend it!

Can We Have a New Conversation?

Neale Donald Walsch's latest book, The Storm Before the Calm, was on my "to read" list, having to do with 2012 and how we can be proactive in our collective future. I'm a big fan of Neale's works, all of them, the Conversations with God series being my "go to" books for answers, inspiration, peace, love - and remembering who I am.

My sister, Cindy, received The Storm Before the Calm as a birthday present in January. Her friend also told her about a group in her area meeting to have "conversations." She called me very excited about the book and the group, so I brought the book home the next day. On the cover reads "Conversations with Humanity."

Neale encourages us to ask ourselves seven questions, and have conversations with others about these topics. He presents the questions as early as pages 43 and 44. When I first read them, my reaction was "Oh, hell no, I do not want to go there." Which is exactly why I am going to go there. It's time to dig deeper. We all could use a deeper dig. In fact, I believe our future depends on a deeper dig.

My women's group is going to work the book and the questions. I am considering having the Higher Self Bookstore host a "conversation" group. You may want to join in right away, so I am going to share four of the questions with you now:

1. Who am I?
2. Where am I?
3. Why am I where I am?
4. What do I intend to do about that?

Who am I? I answer this without labels, such as mother, store owner, daughter, woman, feminist, writer, artist, cook, housekeeper, blahblahblah. I am Divine, a child of God, I am spirit now having an human experience, I am God individuated. I forget this as I am doing all the things my "labels" seem to require of me. And like many of my neighbors, local and globally, I have been very, very busy focusing my attention on survival. Except when I'm not. It has been way too easy to forget who I am.

But now, as encouraged, I ask my self that question everyday and am automatically reminded who I am. Wow, this conversation has already changed my life! I am also going to the web site to participate in conversations there, http://www.TheGlobalConversation.com

What impresses me about the "Occupy" movement is that conversations are happening. It may not be clear what the solutions are, but with enough people talking to each other and sharing what they know, answers can be developed, declared, and demanded. We can go even bigger.

We are going through many changes and we feel we have no control over the future. We are way more powerful than we think. As the line goes in an Indiana Jones film (something like) It's Time to Ask Yourself What It Is You Believe.

If you are interested in participating in the "conversation" at the Higher Self Bookstore, send us an email and let us know: higherselfbooks@aol.com

As I dig into my own answers deeper, I promise to share them with you. I'd love to hear your answers as well. Let's talk - it's important, and it just may be our saving grace.

Why this book, and why these questions and not some other? It is the one before me, it talks to me, I can relate and connect. Neale's has laid out some great guide lines, and has "started" the conversation, and it's a good one!